A few years ago a big movement started with the launching of the movie “The Secret”
According to Jack Canfield
“Simply put, the Law of Attraction states that you will attract into your life whatever you focus on. Whatever you give your energy and attention to will come back to you. So, if you stay focused on the good and positive things in your life, you will automatically attract more good and positive things into your life.”
Doesn’t that sound good? And relatively easy to do right? But something is wrong here and it is not obvious.
First, this sounds like one of those New Age platitudes. A broad generalized statement informing us about something. (I don’t even want to start analyzing it with the NLP Meta Model folks, or we’ll be here until tomorrow).
It sounds like affirmations. Nice, beautiful statements which do… errr… Actually what do affirmations do again? Oh, I remember now – they serve to (hopefully) change your beliefs if you happen to be one of those who do them religiously for several months. People hypnotized themselves into believing they’re mediocre and no good. This is why they need affirmations to tell them that’s not so.
But then why don’t you do Time Line Therapy® Limiting Decisions process to change the belief that’s bothering you in 10 minutes? But that’s another question.
Back to the Law of Attraction. Is it correct? I think it is. It works and the NLP Model of Communication shows us that it could not be any other way. However, one essential element is missing and this is what’s wrong. Nowhere in the Law of Attraction is stated the fundamental step necessary – to take action and DO something. In fact, the way the Law of Attraction is stated, leads only to passivity.
“All right then, if I sit on the couch all day long and I focus on attracting better money in my life or the ideal relationship it will happen.” Oh yeah! And my name is Santa Claus! (Ho. Ho. Ho.)
Doing all of this Law of Attraction mechanically does not imply any doing, any investment of energy, and action at all. It’s about as effective as trying to move forward in an active ocean while sitting in a paper boat and paddling with a soup spoon.
Then two main concepts left out of the Law-of-Attraction-Secret-movie are:
- Doing something consciously about changing old beliefs that prevent one form achieving what one wants.
- Taking concrete action in that direction.
So, let’s make a difference between the “philosophic” concept and the factual results.
The philosophic concept is correct. People who focus on what they want are far more likely to achieve the desired results than people who focus on what they don’t want and with this basic concept we begin our NLP Practitioner Training. It is the basis of the NLP Communication Model.
However people who get the desired results are doing something else aside from focusing on what they want: they take action. They invest time and energy and work toward what they want.
At the same time, not understanding the basic concept of NLP of how information is received, deleted, distorted and generalized before it can even be analyzed consciously, one can assume that the people in very poor countries, dying of malnutrition and disease are focusing on what they don’t want and therefore they attract it. Based on the same simple way of understanding the Law of Attraction a geographic area hit by a devastating tornado or flooding must have a lot of people thinking a lot of negative thoughts.
And here we get into the hazy misunderstanding of something happening independently and something “attracted” by one’s thoughts. The possibility of both happening simultaneously does not occur because we’re all “oh-so-educated-to-thing-black-OR-white-with-no-shades-of-gray-in-between”. Paradoxical thinking where simultaneously different possibilities co-exist is a no-no. From the earliest pre-school years to post graduate level we’re basically indoctrinated with the model of “this VS that”. Nothing in between. We all must fit in the same box. Or else. It is the consensus reality box.
The idea that we can change our beliefs and values and eliminate the counterproductive ones (IE a reality) we don’t like does not enter anybody’s mind.
If your beliefs are of a positive nature, these in turn will create the necessary pulling force that drives you toward the achievement of your goals. It is your belief that creates the Law of Attraction not the other way around.
If Time Line Therapy® techniques can change your thoughts from negative to positive and eliminate those pesky Negative Emotions from the past, and that by doing this process you’ll get clarity in your beliefs about what you want…and you make this your truth IE your belief…and then you make it true in reality….then the Law of Attraction loses its magical meaning and becomes what it really is: a nice philosophical concept to explain our highs or lows in life.
People who are clear about their future and their beliefs about their ability to create it are by far more determined and act on them. They don’t sit in a room and wait for something to happen. They are taking action. But those who don’t want or feel they can’t take action anyway will take the Law of Attraction as a replacement for their inability and they’ll do absolutely nothing about what they want. Then they’ll say the Law of Attraction is a load of bull.
In large numbers of our students, the philosophy of the Law of Attraction is just a stepping stone – if they take action for themselves with the new skills they acquired, it becomes irrelevant. Or maybe it stays relevant only in as much as it is a platform from which they make things happen in their lives. The other minority, cling onto the Law of Attraction for more passivity. They wait on the couch. They think positive thoughts (for about 3 seconds at the time). They may even meditate. They re-think their positive thoughts (for another set of 3 seconds). And when nothing happens they reckon they did not think enough positive thoughts.
And from here on we’re just a step away from societal absolute thought control – you’re not allowed to think some thoughts – they’re bad for you and for society – but surely this is another issue and we’ll leave it for another article.
Until next time be well and take some action. Only YOU can make your dreams a reality.
8 Comments
Stephan Schafeitel
Absolutely! Very well said Adriana. L of A has a hidden component hidden in plain sight…
LAW OF attrACTION
Janelle Fraser
“It’s about as effective as trying to move forward in an active ocean while sitting in a paper boat and paddling with a soup spoon.” hahaha
This analogy made me laugh out loud, I am going to use this one! 🙂
Brett Ellis
Hi Janelle,
So true I laughed out loud when I read your comment as well 🙂
Using the “Law of attraction paradigm” is like trying to fit an ocean into a river! It just doesn’t fit!! 🙂
NLP NEWSLETTER | ISSUE 226
[…] Why The Law Of Attraction Does Not Work – There was an incredibly popular movement 10 years ago that sparked a wave of interest in the field of the mind and its ability to manifest things into our reality. It was called the LAW OF ATTRACTION. Now, whilst the idea sounds great, they left out some fundamental key steps that would have you achieve successful results! What were these key steps? Find out in this week’s first article. […]
Paul Jensen
Great article! I especially liked the part about “Doing something consciously about changing old beliefs . . .” How insidious those can be!
NumoQuest®
There are just a few simple reasons why ‘methods’ like the secret, loa, nlp, many training and course, coaching, psychology, simply doesn’t work, even if they ‘appear’ successful on a particular moment. To illustrate that, I simply point to every great/famous name, you yourself can come up with.
I call this the Universal Principle of 95% 4% 1%. 95% of the people, see what 4% of subtoppers and 1% absolute top, achieved. That is what they want to achieve and there you have a simple ‘rat race’. You have many people, online these days, commercially pretending to be able to tell every one ‘How To….’ while not able to do themselves. You have many ‘coaches’ exclaiming to be able to help you to ….’ You have copies of copies of copies, pretending ‘their way’ is success, hence, commercially for them only, not for those attending.
Then you also have the world of training, courses, seminars, as if ‘that’ is ‘the way to ….’. According the American dream, In God we trust, all other pay cash. But….. here we are, there are simple common denominators working, for every great and successful name you can think of. Basically two, to keep it simple.
1. Natural Born Talents and Soft Skills
These are not the acquired education and working experience as many try to convince you. All the great/famous names, early, later in their lives, simply found what it IS, that works for them, which FIT them. Like Warren Buffet found his passion age seven, while Richard Branson did the finding out first playing around, do some ‘reefing’, starting a school newspaper, than started a record shop where after Virgin Record Studios was next thing. Once they found out, they simply stick to that and repeat just that. Two simple rules, either it work, or it doesn’t …. Their Unique way, becoming to them.
The second is, what I refer to, to keep it simple, Google ‘The Code of Success and Fulfillment….’ It isn’t anything new, a simple handy set of rules the great and famous names are following by heart, no more than that. No new religion or secret. No commerce, just as it is.
The 95% of the people, to distracted by commerce, what others deem or think, trying all kinds of things, not becoming their Natural born Talents and Soft Skills, and there you have the challenge in a nutshell.
All you see around, you, cars, house, close, furniture, everything you can think of, the outcome of that same ‘code’ if you will for some one, one moment in time, came up with an idea, didn’t bother what people thought, said, just create it. Perhaps another later, improved it, but, it comes down to the same. It works.
If the mean, course, training, isn’t in line with your natural born talents and soft skills, you bet ya it simply will not work. And if you don’t KNOW what your Natural Born Talents and Soft Skills are, than that simply is ones first real challenge. The rest? just act becoming that. You have a world around you as living proof it simply works that way.
:O)
PS As you see, no product, religion or anything to sell. Just to share :O)
Adriana James
NumoQuest®, I agree in principle with many things you say, however I disagree also.
RE: I call this the Universal Principle of 95% 4% 1%. 95% of the people, see what 4% of subtoppers and 1% absolute top, achieved. That is what they want to achieve and there you have a simple ‘rat race’. You have many people, online these days, commercially pretending to be able to tell every one ‘How To….’ while not able to do themselves. You have many ‘coaches’ exclaiming to be able to help you to ….’ You have copies of copies of copies, pretending ‘their way’ is success, hence, commercially for them only, not for those attending.
I agree in principle that there are many “techniques” that do not produce results. However, are you alluding to the fact that we are pretending to get results and we have coaches who pretend to be successful and assist clients to get results? Because if you are, I would kindly advise you to do a better research in our work and results. Having a training company yourself, and offering courses which create change, I assume you are also not one of these people you so unkindly refer to.
Re: Then you also have the world of training, courses, seminars, as if ‘that’ is ‘the way to ….’. According the American dream, In God we trust, all other pay cash. But….. here we are, there are simple common denominators working, for every great and successful name you can think of. Basically two, to keep it simple.
I think you are making a broad generalization putting all of the above mentioned courses, seminars, trainings in the same box. It is like saying that all lawyers are by definitions bad or that all doctors are by definitions good. In my opinion all training seminars who are honestly (and here is the key) doing their best to assist others to find the inner resources and develop new strategies for success and satisfaction in life are to be praised.
Re: 1. Natural Born Talents and Soft Skills
These are not the acquired education and working experience as many try to convince you. All the great/famous names, early, later in their lives, simply found what it IS, that works for them, which FIT them.
But what if, through NLP and Time Line Therapy® and especially values work people can find out – not by chance later on in life – but when they choose, their innate abilities and talents? What’s wrong with that? I completely agree with you that we all have talents and soft skills and I also would like to point out that through acceptance of decisions and beliefs many people do not make the most of what these inner resources they already have. Nobody is born thinking they are not good enough and yet how many people believe it? Nobody is born believing that they’re unhappy and yet how many people believe it? Do you get it? It is a belief which has been formed or adopted. Nobody is born believing they are not handsome enough, and yet how many people have low self-esteem issues? If one believes one is not good enough, even if one were to be in touch with their natural talents and soft skills (which by the way is your opinion and I do not subscribe to it in the way you describe it as a ‘be all and do all, nothing to do here, move along’) one will not even try to actualize their inborn capabilities because…why bother? One feels not good enough. End of story. But if one could let go of that belief (it’s just a belief), one could then actualize their inborn talents and skills, isn’t that true?
Re: Two simple rules, either it work, or it doesn’t …. Their Unique way, becoming to them.
But again, something that could work may not work because the person is not even aware of that “unique way” that elusive “something”. And what if, a person can be coached to discover what prevents them for making that something work? Would that make a difference?
Re: The second is, what I refer to, to keep it simple, Google ‘The Code of Success and Fulfillment….’ It isn’t anything new, a simple handy set of rules the great and famous names are following by heart, no more than that. No new religion or secret. No commerce, just as it is.
I see your code in the search engine, and I get WHAT is, but I don’t get HOW to change what prevents me from making the most of my innate abilities? You assume that most people don’t know them? WHAT it is does not equal HOW to do it. Each individual is different but each individual can make the best of him/herself. That’s what we assist people to discover and do.
I also agree with you that each person’s way is different compared to others. This is a major pillar of what we teach in all our trainings and one of the fundamental principles for the beginners in NLP.
Re: The 95% of the people, to distracted by commerce, what others deem or think, trying all kinds of things, not becoming their Natural born Talents and Soft Skills, and there you have the challenge in a nutshell.
Commerce has been in the world forever. For good or for bad this is the world in which we live. Everything is ruled by commerce and economics. Even the politics of Holland. But here you are mostly talking about values. A little known fact is that values are individual. Every person has his/her individual values. You may think that all people have the same values but they don’t. Different geographical areas have different values, countries can have different values. Values determine one’s motivation and so what motivates you may not motivate someone else at all. so while someone wants to be a sales person and another a philosopher, none of the two is better than the pother. I thought we agreed that each individual is different… Therefore, what is right for you is wrong for someone else. If your values differ from someone else’s does that mean that their values are wrong and yours are right? Who said so? According to whom? I do not try to convince you that what I say is good for you, you are the judger of that based on your values. But the same is true for me and any other human being.
Re: All you see around, you, cars, house, close, furniture, everything you can think of, the outcome of that same ‘code’ if you will for some one, one moment in time, came up with an idea, didn’t bother what people thought, said, just create it. Perhaps another later, improved it, but, it comes down to the same. It works.
There is no secret “code”. That’s a nice marketing to have people run around to find it. If there is one secret is in plain sight. That all human beings are capable each in their own way. As civilization progresses the capacity for the human brain to think differently changes too, and our values change. These new ideas and creativity spawn new ways of thinking out of which comes for example AI, nano-technology, genetics, robotics, and the like. This is all new and in a hundred years there will be other new things. It’s called evolution of consciousness.
Re: If the mean, course, training, isn’t in line with your natural born talents and soft skills, you bet ya it simply will not work.
And you will lose the bet. Again you think of content instead of structure.
You are talking about the WHAT it is and we are talking about the structure or HOW the mind operates. NLP as we teach it, and Time Line Therapy® do not operate on content but on structure. I know we are different from other NLP organizations and we teach this in a very unique way. Nevertheless, regardless of your specific natural talents the structure by which you hold that in consciousness and you make the most (or least) of them is not a matter of. How you think is not the same as what you think. And not all people think in the same way. This is why discovering how you think is part of NLP.
Re: And if you don’t KNOW what your Natural Born Talents and Soft Skills are, than that simply is ones first real challenge. The rest? just act becoming that. You have a world around you as living proof it simply works that way.
This may be true for you and may be your experience but it is not mine. I see series after series of graduates going out in the world and making a difference because they change the limitations, the Limiting Decisions an Limiting Beliefs they used to have inside themselves (more precisely in their past memories as accepted in childhood or even later in life), and thus get in touch with that innate talent and ability that you talk about, that “something” inside. This happens naturally during the discovery processes in our trainings. We are so proud of them as they really make a difference.
Re: PS As you see, no product, religion or anything to sell. Just to share :O
Except from your trademark name which lead me to your Facebook, Twitter, web-pages, etc. where you advertise your trainings, seminars, and also aside from the “Code of Success & Fulfillment and Relations….” You got me to go to your advertising and research you. Well done, although not very subtle.
Everyone who won't tell you these things
Awful article, very poorly written and so full of topological errors — very difficult to follow as a result.